Tag Archives: children

The Remains of The Day

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timid spring.

the careless beauty of my children romping in the woods today,

sharp, colorful, against the greening gray backdrop,

gathering twigs for a “bonfire” but first washing them in the tumbles of water or

stacking them one upon another and into bridges

alongside the brook where they were leaping, looking for frogs;

huge stones splashing in that murky fluid, one foot deep, and up bursting fountains of light,

their voices rippling across the clearings,

their giggles, their eyes flickering – light, love

shooting out of them like glittering spearheads through the trees, shouting, climbing, jumping!

what sweet, suffocating melancholy; soft warm fluff settling heavy on my soul,

my soul – itself by now the peaceful glowing aftermath of a fire,

dilated and silent, with only the crackling of cooling cinder

and water trickling on nearby, my soul

suffused with nothing but

clarity

yes, the quiet serenity of the desire to embrace life, the world,

the sizzling beauty of raw earth sprouting, of budding leaves and yellow and pink flowers,

of young lives so thick with promise, of souls so nimble, of days so limpid!

my children. my gift. my promise – to them:

a love so full, so simple, so complete.

a love absolute.

don’t hold me. you’ll lull me back into nothingness.

don’t hold me…

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7 Reasons I Am Eager To Go Back To School (My Son’s Version)

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1. To see my teacher again. She’s pretty.

2. To learn new and interesting stuff (hopefully about animals).

3. To meet my friends.

4. Less time to be nagged by mom.

5. Less time to be nagged by my younger sister.

6. I want to become a natural scientist.

7. I want to become a natural scientist and make films and pictures of wild animals and show them on TV.

10 Reasons I Love The Summer Vacation (My Son’s Version)

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1. Sleep

2. Sleep

3. More sleep

4. Cartoons

5. Cartoons

6. More cartoons

7. Sun, sand, water, ice cream

8. Sun, rocks, water, ice cream

9. Sun, grass, water, ice cream

10. Reading, LEGO, board games, trees, voyages of discovery, pebbles and insects (except mosquitoes!).

Laughing stock

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My daughter (2yrs. 7 months) just chose a profession.

I was putting nose drops into her nostrils, an action which – as was to be expected – led to a certain amount of hysterical yelling and rivers of tears rolling down her cheeks.

Me:

“Lady, you sure have a nice pack of loudspeakers on you! People can hear you all the way to the stadium… I think you’ll be a soprano when you grow up.”

Her (quick at repartee):

“Nooooo.”

Me:

“Oh, really, then what are you going to be?”

Her (as if, ‘duuh, mom, that is soooo obvious‘):

“A clown!”

I think she is well on her way.

PS:

Oh, and my son, who dreads blood but wants to be a veterinarian, was quite concerned yesterday when I complained about feeling lonely. He got so emotional, he actually allowed me to play with his stuffed elephant while he’s in school. Like, ‘Geez, mom, use your brain! You’ve got all these toys to keep you company…’

You see, I already live in a circus. Right there, just off the rails, in the mothers’ compound…

Sandy Hook Elementary

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There is evil in the world. The devil walks among us. The government cannot control the minds of its citizens, some of which are obviously deranged. But the government can and should control the means they can use to commit gruesome acts of violence.  Senseless mayhem of these proportions is only possible with powerful guns.

The children of Sandy Hook Elementary School are the unnecessary martyrs of a world centered around violence and a twisted sense of self-reliance. A primitive world, where children learn to shoot weapons before they grow pubic hair. A world where children learn what it is to be shot at, or threatened at gunpoint at an age where they can hardly process it. Which only feeds into the paranoia, the sense of insecurity and the never-ending arms race. You watch footage of the police descending on that place and it looks like the country is waging civil war on itself.

Lord, have mercy on those poor devastated parents and all the rest of us shocked bystanders. The souls of the executed children will be caroling in Heaven this year…

Wake-up call

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Dear readers, dear friends,

thank you so much for following my blog and thank you for your comments. Please have understanding if I am going to be a little quiet, a little absent for a while. Our family went through a traumatic experience two days ago. We could have lost our sweet little girl, our giggle-box who is always upbeat. She fell down an entire flight of stairs at a friend’s house, rolled over three times and landed on her face at the bottom. It was my fault, I didn’t pay attention, and a few seconds is all it takes.

My son and I are still very shaken, having witnessed the whole thing, my husband who was out of town and had to rush home to the hospital is still walking in a daze. She lost a tooth and dislodged another, but apart from that, miraculously, there was NOT ONE bruise on her head or body.

I want to take this opportunity to THANK GOD AND HER GUARDIAN ANGEL(S) for saving our daughter. While we were in the hospital, and she had finally fallen asleep connected to those monitors, I just sat up and looked at her and thought how beautiful she is and how much I love her and how I would give anything to be able to keep her safe forever. When she was very little, I used to watch her sleep quite often, but somehow along the way I just forgot to be grateful. Well, I am grateful now, more than you can imagine. I AM TRULY TRULY GRATEFUL! I would also like to thank my friend I. who kept her cool and offered unconditional support, the ambulance crew, particularly the very dedicated emergency doctor who pulled rank and drove us to the right hospital for her jawbone to be examined and her tooth re-positioned, as well as the personnel at the Uni Klinikum Children’s Ward, who gave a terrified and conflicted mother a lot of their patience.

Every wobbly step she takes now, I get a heart attack and my son gets all flushed and starts to tremble (he is the most caring, loving and responsible older brother anybody can have), and her smile is not quite the same, but she is here with us, she’s playing, she’s her usual jolly self, she’s alive.

Forget ambition, pride and all that crap that seems important when we’re on top of the world. The only thing that really matters is that we are God’s partners in creating life. Real life. Real souls. A fancy house, a prestigious job, our self-absorbed plans?… none of that is worth a rat’s ass. Things can always be fixed. With people, it’s often irreversible.